The Top Ten Signs The Suspect Is Connected To Organized Crime

1. He used his only phone call to contact a guy named “Mikey Two-Guns.”
2. He keeps telling the detectives to call his “handlers” at the Bureau.
3. Last year he gave everyone in the neighborhood a flat-screen TV for Christmas.
4. Neighbors call his basement “the graveyard where rats and pigeons go to die.”
5. He won’t stop talking about the interrogation technique he developed which involves pop-rocks, kerosene and a pack of matches.
6. On surveillance tapes he’s always saying stuff like, “I saw the guy from the place about the thing with the stuff.”
7. He tried to tip the desk sergeant during booking.
8. He says he understands how hard it is to be a cop because the Mob also has a restrictive facial hair policy.
9. His pinky ring is the size of a cat’s head.
10. After you ask him if he had anything to do with the murder, he asks you if you’re going to make this week’s vig.

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